__________a n g e l in need of a direction

Sunday, February 15, 2004

valentine's not as bad as i thought it would be. 'cause you know, i'm like so date-less and unwanted. but going out with my girlfrens is quite okay. -laugh- and no, in case you didn't know, it doesn't get on my nerves and i'm definitely not depressed about that fact that i'm not going out on a date with a guy yesterday. 'cause i don't see the point of valentine's day. besides the fact that i'll probably receive some sweet lil gifts from my friends? yea.

what's the point of celebrating an exaggerated valentine's day when you could show your significant other your love everyday. or any other 364 days in a year. which basically comes to the point, why are we celebrating teacher's day then? to show our appreciation towards them [not like they're much appreciated by us anyway. it's their job. they're paid to do so yea]? or to let the teachers off from their daily exasperation from us nuisances. i won't care what's the purpose behind that day 'cause at the very least, we've got a day off from school.

what's the point of giving roses when ultimately, they'll just wilt and die. and are they whatsoever that are gonna symbolise the couple's forever-lasting love? it's kinda a paradox. or is it just fun to see and torture those poor flowers to death? or it is just a tradition you're following so brainlessly and uncreatively?

what's the point of spending big bucks on gifts and dinner with prices jacked up so much just because it's valentine's and we're supposed to celebrate love. just so to impress your significant other? probably you are too thick to realise how dense you are.

and what's the point of a girls' school if it gets so hyped up about this occasion? isn't our school supposed to be some kinda restraint from distractions of the opposite sex and bgr? isn't it supposed to have absolutely nothing to do with this mushy and inane romanticism everywhere? and they went so far as putting up flimsy odd-looking valentine's day decorations made from some pink crepe paper and balloons along the pathway from the foyer to the hall. i'd rather there be no decorations and use the money for other purposes instead.

and there's the song dedication thing which i don't really mind. we get to listen to songs during recess as entertainment when the others made stupid pointless dedications to others. and it makes the cafeteria funkier. though it gets on my nerves when william hung's version of "she bangs" was played over and over again so many times.

see. everything's just so valentine's-orientated.

and it appears to me that if you don't get into this lovely-dovey atmosphere, you don't have a life. which is seemingly stupid.

so tell me, what's the big hoo-hah about valentine's day anyway.

fine. maybe i'm behaving like i'm getting sour about myself being valentine-less. but i think i'm just too practical to be that romantic. or maybe it's just 'cause i've never been attached.

oh happy birthday bloggie anyway!

quite insane of me to blog at this hour. but i can't sleep. slept for like 5 hours in the afternoon before going out. and i'm having diarrhoea now. shitting the hell outta me. damn.

and i was kinda hyper just now with sue and zing. but they thought i looked sian. it's not like i can do anything much about my kiam-pa face yea.

i was feeling so awkward and annoyed with the hordes of irritating couples flooding practically everywhere in town. and all because of those airheads, we've got nowhere to go! no movie-watching in cine, no places for us to sit in starbucks, no empty machines for us to take neoprints. it sucks, doesn't it?

so anyway, my first date on my sweetsixteen valentine's day, it's quite boy-less. we went to the box office in cine to check out the timeslot. all the tickets were sold out. as in those in 9++ PM. so we went over to yoshinoya in taka. and sue and i got ourselves our second dinner. i think. it was nice going out and talking to them as usual. but we just felt so lame and retarded going to town just for a dinner. without our usual activities. and we were just there for an hour or two. decided to go sentosa next friday anyway. after prefect investiture. x) tanning session! whee!

note to myself: never ever go out again on valentine's day. unless you're quite sure you'll get to do whatever you feel like doing, an excellent example would be watching a good movie.

had chemistry re-test last monday. was pretty good. at least i was quite confident i'll be able to score well. got 20/25. x) had bio test on thursday. doubt my marks will be good. 'cause i don't know what i was writing. and i was just so flummoxed about everything. especially the part about the eyes. 'cause i mugged last-minute again. -sigh- but i was really tired. no point crying over spilled milk. and i died horribly in kaocha. liwei's so gonna nag at me when he returns it back to us.

and last tuesday was sher's birthday. was quite scared that i got the date all wrong. but thank goodness i was right. so went down to her classroom and gave her the present that my mum kindly helped me wrap. hugged her. aww.

mum's frens was over at my house on tuesday too. they were commenting how much my mum and i look alike now. and we look like sisters together. but i still don't see any alikeness we're sharing. i guess they thought it was a compliment to me. my mum's quite good-looking. haha. but they never understand that it's quite insulting too. 'cause that means i look old. ohwell.

wednesday was quite cool. i mean in library. 'cause there're so many juniors that i didn't need to do anything. there's no space for me to do anything anywhere anyway. so i was just there kinda supervising and studying my bio textbook. x) that's the good thing about overcrowding of librarians in a certain group. no more slogging away.

but i don't really like the juniors. i don't know why, but they love to say hi. too much. which absolutely can drive me crazy. i'll get used to their over-friendliness soon. just gimme more time. maybe they think i'm dao. that's why they're trying to be nice to umm, break the ice? but they can't change the fact that i don't like new faces. i'm just too stuck to yihui. the only junior of mine left after so many years. my dahling yihui, who apparently's my day-leader. haha. what a joke. she's the one ordering me around.

and com service on friday in kk hospital was quite good. at least we did something productive. and we were damn efficient. finished packing the dumex thingamajig within an hour or so. and i drove sue crazy with my excitement in packing everything so fast. cheap thrill. and mel was really mad. i think she's really high these few days.

we had chicken rice there too. quite good.

dad came to pick me up after jeremy's appointment in some other hospital. whoo! we got a digital camera and this 3-in-1 printer, copier and scanner. x) fun~ and this oven too. after they picked me up, we went over to my gramma's house for dinner. and i slept for an hour or so. which isn't really surprising 'cause i'm a pig.

oh thanks avonne. for your sweet valentine's present. x)

i think i'm starting to lag behind my schedule. starting to get back into handing-everything-late shit again. i shall buck up man.

i suspect my mum thinks i'm attached. to a guy she never knew of. 'cause after i went to school to hand in my yuwenlianxi to liwei yesterday morning, we went tampines mall to have our lunch. and after that, we were in ntuc so i was like buying chocolates for my girlfrens as valentine's presents. and i said i'll pass to them that evening. and in the end i didn't even bring them out. 'cause i thought they won't even have the bags to carry them. and she probably thinks that i'm crapping up some lame excuses to cover up the fact that i'm going out with a guy or something to that extent. and i'm just risking everything to just go out yesterday for the fun of it. and late nite on valentine's day of all times.

why would people think i'm attached and i'll be busy on valentine's and i'll get loadsa presents huh? it's so ridiculous. 'cause the reality isn't what they think it is.

haha. and i'm so amused with this lameshit i've crapped up after sue and angie were debating over something about me. sue thinks i look like a tortoise. angeline thinks so too. but her sis thinks i look like a bunny. and not forgetting ben who thinks i look like a rabbit and he calls me rabbit too.

"so am i supposed to win the race?!"

go figure it out yourself. pretty lame i know.

i'm getting sick of typing this entry. so i shall stop here. i'll be back. i think. -shrug-

heaven by your side;
x 3:03 am