__________a n g e l in need of a direction

Friday, June 24, 2005

man i feel lazy. i doubt i'll ever blog about my birthday and the week before that. t'was seriously hell loadsa fun. (:

i think this holiday's quite fruitful. study quite a bit and play quite a bit too. had fun either ways. so that's pretty good, i say. it'd be purrfect if i could do more catching up with the bestie and sue. ): we'll go for breakfast hot dates and nice sleepovers at mel's and talk about anything and everything under the sun together yeah, jammies? love! (:

i reckon i'll, uh no, make that i am moving on. instead of dwelling on what ifs, what could have beens, and what would have beens and the like.

it's just impossible given the current circumstances, i guess. and i'm contented with whatever i have now, i suppose. and it's probably just a longer-than-usual infatuation that i believe it's time to get over it fast and be logical and focus on what's more important. it's been my motivation, but i conclude that i should just get more realistic goals and drives then.

and i think i've no idea how it feels like to be in love with someone actually. but i could sense the bittersweetness this time. ohwells. but it's just so empty inside with disappoinments and nothing more and i've been so cynical for half my life about love, relationships and what-have-you that.. yeah. i'm gonna move on and i'm pretty sure i'll just win the bets i have with terence and zihua. oh hmm. i actually won terence already. it's just a matter of time how i'm gonna defeat zihua then.

i feel lonely sometimes. and i've no idea why i say that. i figure out the best is to just let go of all negative thoughts that have been going through my mind nowadays and bury myself in books and more books and become a mugger-toad wannabe. (:

term exams in three days. not exactly a very pleasant thought to have.

heaven by your side;
x 10:19 am